In Case You Are Young

From cover of book Letters to a Young Generation.

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When you are young, the urge to do more will consume you, but self-doubt can slow you down. If you walk away with nothing else from this article, understand that now is the time and some people want you to waste it. Here is your self-fulfillment guide to avoid being old, angry and bitter.

Do It Now

It’s not ever too late to start, but there is no better time than now. When people get older, some feel their age is a barrier, even when it isn’t. Instead of doing while they were young, they let time pass them by only to use that time as an excuse to give up. It’s a cycle of defeatism reinforced by a lack of action. When you start now, you get it out the way.

If you don’t know where to start, start at the beginning.

As an example, it can take roughly four years to get a bachelor’s degree. However, it’s a lifelong credential that impacts a person’s work life which is about forty-two years in America. No one has to get a degree, but a person who wants one and doesn’t earn one will have a lot of coping to do. Imagine going a lifetime watching family members, friends and others earn something you wanted but didn’t earn. If you have control over this narrative, why not act now? If you don’t know where to start, start at the beginning.

The influencer selling handmade beaded bracelets didn’t start with a million followers and a Shopify store. They started with an idea and a few cheap items laying around. Because they had vision, they had the ability to start, regardless of how “small” that start was. Also, you have to identify your real competition and ignore the rest.

A Marathon of One

There is someone in the world better at chess than you are. Someone jumps higher, runs faster or has a prettier pair of shoes. It’s a fact of life that someone is better than you are at something or has something you’ve wanted. But you are also better at some things than others. Either way, what does it matter if someone is faster or has more? It doesn’t, but if it does to you, you will not succeed in what’s really a marathon of one.

Competition can motivate in some instances, but it can’t fulfill.

Why are some people so over-competitive? Competition draws attention and compliments. It allows the winner to say, “I’m better than you.” Competition can motivate in some instances, but it can’t fulfill. When a person was ignored in their childhood, they seek validation. The problem is, that validation is temporary and contingent upon the person continuing to win (Think Clarissa Shields compared to Laila Ali, who Clarissa is hating on). Those who are the best at what they do measure themselves against the “them” they were a week ago, a year ago, a decade ago. Those measuring themselves against others don’t grow because they don’t have a reference point for where they were. They are also prone to making excuses.

When a person judges themselves against others, they find ways to blame outside forces when they don’t win. They say that the other person has more resources or access. They don’t say, “I should find ways to get better.” They say, “I have to find an excuse.” If they are their only competition, the variables are set. Your competition isn’t better equipped than you because you are the competition. Moreover, if you are the best, competing against others might stunt your growth.

… beating subpar competition doesn’t make you better.

As an example, beating subpar competition doesn’t make you better. It might get you outside validation from those who are slow to think. But it won’t ever get you the respect of critical thinkers. It’ll do the opposite. A person who loses to a fierce competitor is respected more than one who tramples over an opponent who didn’t stand a chance. That’s just bullying with extra steps. And avoid procrastinating, or the results will ruin you.

If You Procrastinate

Time waits for no one, and if you procrastinate too long, you’ll change the course of your life and not for the best. They say the king and the pawn go back into the same box at the end of the game. While this is true, the wise would much rather live the life of a king over that of a pawn. Choosing to act now could make all the difference, as many before you found out.

… we see the jewels but not the process of refinement that took to make them.

Mark Zuckerberg didn’t leave college in a fit of self-loathing defeat. He left after building a solid network and the necessary outside connections. Facebook wouldn’t have happened had he not gone to college and eventually left when he did. He made a business choice before earning a degree, and Elon Musk did it after earning two bachelor’s degrees and dropping in the middle of an advanced degree program. What would have happened had they procrastinated?

In reality, we see the jewels but not the process of refinement that took to make them. Surely, Elon and Mark had their moments of self-doubt and the days they could’ve done more. Yet they continued. Whether you like either, you have to acknowledge the strategic success of the grind. If you miss your moment, the future could look bleak.

Some people only want to tear down because they can’t build.

What is there to say to a man who secretly bad mouths his successful nephew because he himself didn’t do what his nephew did? What is there to say to a woman who turns her nose up at every young woman with determination? Truly, there is nothing to say because these haters are incapable of hearing. They only want to tear down because they can’t build. You’re better than that.

The Takeaway

Imagine spreading lies about a person who you hate because they succeeded. Imagine being the person to receive that hate. If you have done anything right in your life, have any accomplishments, you probably already have received this hate. Is this something you want to put into the Universe? Do you want this hate eating you from the inside out? If not, invest in yourself right now. That investment starts with treating your time like money and spending it with strategic intent. The future you will thank you for this because you and they are one and the same. But they can’t exist ten years from now without the you today seeing the value in future them, in yourself now. As Nike would say, just do it.

Jermaine Reed, MFA is an educator and the Editor-in-Chief of TheReedersBlock. Take time to Subscribe. It helps promote independent journalism and the site. Follow him on TikTok, where he has over 9 million views and nearly 1 million likes. Help him get there.